life after it all

I'm not posting as much as I was.  And I have no excuse.  Work isn't exactly busy, but it has kept me busy.  This past week especially I was not so much busy, but worn out when I got home.  I had the justice policy forum for two days, then training on another day.  So three days this week I was out of the office and then combined with yoga and Valentines Day, well, my evenings were full of sleep and relaxation.

the justice Forum was very interesting.  I got to see (not really meet) people in my building and the Brownlee building.  And I got to formulate a better idea of what my place is in Court Services/ALberta Justice.  The training was for ARTS (Action Return Tracking System).  Its the program we use when we deal with briefing notes etc.  It was very boring, but necessary.  Valentines Days night was great.  I went with Chantelle and two of her friends to dinner at Pack Rat Louis.  Very nice place and I had an expensive, but nice dinner.  We talked shop (Chantelle and one of her friends are lawyers) and we chatted about men.  And the sad state of men in Edmonton.  While it was a great evening, I left thinking "Damn, if these fine women are single (and not by choice), what chance do I have?"  Sigh.  But my life is focusing on my career right now, so its not a big issue.  I feel I'm on the verge of dating a few men now anyway, so we will see how things go. 

And this weekend is a long weekend.  I spent yesterday in Yoga - which was awesome.  I felt really strong and today I do not hurt.  And I hoofed it down to Whyte ave to explore a little and have supper and read.  All in all it was a pleasant trip.  I enjoy spending time alone in public places.  Its a part of me that has grown so much over the past 5/6 years.  And now I look forward to spending time reading in public places.  A good glass of wine and a good book are great ways to spend an afternoon.

Today is relaxing day.  I'm trying out my slow cooker.  Yes, I have had it for weeks.  but I've never used it.  So I'm not too keen to go away from the house for too long.  But I will go get groceries.  Hopefully the slow cooker doesn't explode while I'm gone.

And tomorrow is Family Day.  There might be another trip with a book in store.

And a call to Nadine.  Exciting!

So I've been living alone for one week.  Its different than living with roommates.  Obviously.  In some respects I like it better and in others I like it less.  I'm sure it will settle as time goes on.  Either way, I'm content. And contentment has been an elusive quality for me over the past year.

Work is good.  Its been slow.  But I can see things picking up now.  I feel bad for my coworker because shes run off her feet and I'm just coasting along, waiting for things to happen.  This week will hopefully prove to be a leveller.  We both must attend the Justice Policy forum and by the time I get back I think I will have a load more work on my desk.  the job has great potential to be very rewarding, but I'm not sure if I will spend the rest of my life doing it.  In fact, I'm pretty sure I won't.  I guess I will get expereience for as long as they want me and then move on to do what I truly want to spend my life doing.  What that is, I don't know.  But this is a nice place to start.  People are really nice and I hope I can establish some good friendships here.

I continue to have South Africans haunt me.  In addition to a South African in my office, I also have a South African yoga instructor.  So far, none are from Cape Town (that honor was left to my Internist in St. John's).  For this I am thankful.  As much as I would love to just curl up in a ball and ignore all things South African, they are chasing me down and I am more convinced than ever that South Africans are in my life for a reason - a reason I don't know.  This is despite the fact that a friend thinks I'm insane for thinking this.  But eh, hes in Asia and surrounded by them everyday.

I'm hoping Kathy comes up to visit in April for the Junos.  It will/would be great to have Kathy up for my birthday. 

And I'm still thinking of heading to London later in the year to visit a friend.  Zoom Airlines has a special on, but I would have to make a choice before the ned of the week and I don't think I'm ready to make that decision (let alone pick dates) yet.  But the idea is still there. 

I'm done now.  I'm ready to go to Edmonton.  I'm not packed fully, but I'm done with my parents.  Its plain to see why children move out.  Old wounds and issues were drudged up last night and like always, I'm the one who is made out to be a self-ish, mean brat who is still as self-centred as I was 10 years ago.  Not exactly loving words (said behind my back) by my folks, but not surprising words as I've been hearing mean things said about me since I was 12 by my parents.  Anyway, I confronted them about above mentioned 20 years of things said behind my back and they responded like I would have if I was caught doing something I should have known better.  sigh.  2 days. Then 10 days with my father.  Just hold your tongue.

On a better note, I went for a drink with Nadine after work last night and we settled into the Grapevine (my favourite St. John's wine spot).  We drank red wine and watched as a very drunk 19 year old had a melt down on the phone with her boyfriend.  It made me very happy that I didn't have a cell phone when I was silly enough to drink wine, cocktails and shots all within a 2 hour period.  (Ok ok, so I was still doing that at 22, but I digress).  I'm no longer doing that sort of thing and I never had yelling matches with anyone over my cell phone - not the least of which are yelling matches where someone feels the need to yell (from the mens washroom - yes, she was a girl) "But if you just let me tell you I love you!" It was a little sweet that she wished to tell her very angry boyfriend she loved him, however, I had just witnessed this girl hanging off another very drunk piece of crap (not her boyfriend).  So I had to laugh.  the wonders of youth.

Last night was my last night with A Special Touch.  As much as I bitched about the job, my bitching was really only about the job.  I loved the people I worked with and I will miss them a lot.  Some need a very loud shout out - Cathy (who was let go about 3 weeks ago), Shirley (who gave me a bottle of wine last night), Linda Dawe (who is just the best mother anyone could ask for), Darlene, Dani...and everyone else.  They are a wonderful bunch of girls/women whom I will always have a special place in my heart for.

Today was my second last day of retail work.  It was inventory day and I was matched up with Danielle - super cool blond chick who kicked inventory ass with me today (and moaned with me when our good will was abused).  But after inventory a few of us work friends were to go out and have a drink or two - including the super cool Linda.  However we are having a storm today.  so while inventory went ahead (albeit cut short because of said storm), drinks could not.  Argh.  I was irritated with the abuse of mine and Danielle's good will and then to have a glass of wine snatched out form under my nose!?  I was put into a bad mood which is staying with me still. 

And the storm hasn't really started - but boy oh boy is there a lot down.  Wait until the wind starts!

But Alberta doesn't have storms really.  Just occasional snow (which stays because its so cold in the winter).  So I should be somewhat happy about the no more snow.  Except I will miss the snow days.  :(

I think I'm also going to have some trouble finding a place to live in Edmonton.  At least in the area I want to live in.  I want Whyte Ave (82nd Ave) area and I'm reluctant to take much less.  Its close to work (close enough to walk in the summer).  And its in a very boho area which Bevin calls Obs-ish/Gardens (ENOUGH with the Cape Town references people!!!).

And I think I may be coming down with a cold.  I've been working with the above mentioned super cool Danielle for a few days and she dying.  I thought I could aviod it, but as I was coming home from work I just felt it.  You know what I mean.  Ugh.  Cold FX here I come.

So I'm also still packing.  I have one bag packed and some clothes picked out for the second (of three).  I'm super excited. 

Yea!